yet

i got most malignant person as my examiner.
i got an irritated young patient who's crying when I examined him.
which made me more nervous.
and i stumble for the next second case.

and i think i did well for my long case. Got an elderly chinese man who was heroin user, chronic smoker with past history of TB and now presented with COPD. and got lalalaa talking from TB, bronchietasis, copd, heroin, even HIV in 30minutes.

the truth is
i feel so weak after the exam. i mean, i have been studying religiously for 5 years and my future had been tested for only 2hours. this is not fair. i dunno. because suddenly i feel like i was alone in the old boat with cruel storm and heavy rain.

and only God can help me.
the result only revealed tmrw.
i dunno how am i going to face it. if only my lecturers going to stand up for me.
the only thing that i can do is to pray..

I know, 6months is not that cruel. it's not the end of the world yet. it's not a disease. it's not a cancer. but how am i going to find motivation and strength and build up my confident level again. ..i really hope not...

Ya Allah, Help me!